Thankfulness

I just wanted to pop in and say that despite the turmoil in my life at present I still have so much to be thankful for.

A beautiful daughter, supportive & loving friends & family. My 4 loving fur babies.
A roof over my head, a nice fire to keep us warm and food in the cupboard, just to list a few!

I will readily admit that I have been focusing on the negative too much lately so now that I've realised that, I just wanted to shout out to the universe that I AM THANKFUL!

Have a cracker of a Wednesday xox

Feeling old.

I got a new handset today. I'm now rocking a galaxy s4. I have only the vaguest idea of what the hell I'm doing but i seem to have the basics down. I can blog, install apps & change my wallpaper. Send texts and I assume make calls. (I don't think anyone would appreciate a 1am phone call, even if it is from me!) But I can't get on fb or messenger or find my little emoticons for texting.
Such first world problems.
My younger sister is assisting me and failing that I'm sure that the worm could tell me what to do. (She's 3)
Feeling slightly old right now.
I don't even think mobiles had been invented when I was young. I didn't get my first phone until I was 18 and it was a brick, the only game you could play was that worm game & it was one non colour teeny tiny screen. No Internet or any of that either. How things have changed!

I just had to share

I achieved something really awesome that I've wanted to do for a long time. My sense of achievement and "rightness" is off the scale right now.
I completed my reiki level 1 today.
New awakenings have already begun.

ANZAC Day

So, it is only the wee hours of the morning and i'm glad that I don't have to get up for the dawn service, as I would resemble a zombie (more so than usual).
I do want to thank all armed service personnel that protect our way of life now, sacrificed their lives in the past for my way of life now and their ongoing commitment to my country's way of life in the future.
There is a strong military connection in my family. My little brother was in Afghanistan and I thank him for his dedication and action. It wasn't easy.

We really are very lucky. Taking time each day to give thanks and show kindness is the least we can do to repay those who gave their lives, were willing to risk their lives and those who will serve in the future. Thank you.

Lest we forget.

Saturday Night - First EVER date night!

Yes, after over 10 years together, and nearly 5 years of marriage - our first ever date night. Turns out when you don't see each other every day you put in a bit of effort! Who would have thought?

We saw Noah tonight - we both quite enjoyed it. That in itself is unusual as we don't tend to like the same movies, songs, foods, hobbies or anything really! Opposites attract.

This week has been crazy. So crazy I cannot in fact recall much of what has happened at all. Oh yes I can! It was crazy busy because my sister was down for a week long whirlwind visit! YAY! I love when my sister comes to visit. It's exhausting but I love it. And the worm loves her Aunty. And, instead of just chocolate for Easter, I also scored 2 new pairs of jeans, now that i'm a bit skinnier and apparently it's not cool to go out wearing your compression gym pants ;)


I did make these. Not sure if I've already shown you.

And I've been creative... So here goes. Enjoy your Saturday night peeps.

The beast flies high & mighty in the sky

Roaring in triumph but for what, who knows

The silent battle where the real fight lies

Hidden by the anger and fury on the outside

Beneath the volcano at the base of the mount

My old friend anger sits poised to pounce

You should be retired now old friend of mine

Not risen once more to do battle within my mind

The time for peace must be now

Or forever doomed to this cycle I'll be

Go rest old friend, let the dragon sleep

My hear grows weary and my soul it weeps

Forget the pain, you have seen me through it

The hurt is gone, that rage now useless

Sleep until I needs battle again

I must find your twin your opposite end

I seek peace and love, your shelter no more

A fear I must face to move beyond this place

No fear is greater than fear itself

Mine is mighty, but so too am I

Come down now dragon come down from on high

I seek slumber and rest, your life force is mine

Now moving forward to a place of the divine

Refill your cup, let it overflow now

Your time is at its end

You will be remembered dear friend

Embrace the light, the birds fly free

And I with them, they will lead me to be.

ETSY - it's time to get this stuff happening

OK. Anyone an expert on ETSY shop set up etc? 
All input would be welcome.
I shall start trawling through their how to's and help as of tomorrow. 
But seriously, I'm going to bed now!

Sunday. Good old reliable Sunday.

Yep. Once a week, every week, Sunday comes around, and all too quickly it goes again.
Kind of like a sale at your favourite store - you hang out till pay day but by then, all the good stuff is gone. Ever time. Without fail.
Sundays in our house are pretty average to be honest. I want Sunday to be family fun day, or family day, or just fun day. Seems that by Sunday we are exhausted, except for the 3 year old energizer bunny that doesn't know Sunday is for chillaxing!

After kid wrangling for 6 days in a row, I am exhausted by Sunday, and I want to spend at least a week in bed. Not likely as there is SO much to do! And our house is one of those good old fixer upperers that leave you feeling overwhelmed before you've even begun. Hence why very little has been done in the 9 years we've lived here. Hence why I think I'm on the verge of a break down.
I have several 'diabilities' (although i don't like to think of them as that) that physically restrict what I can and can't do. It is beyond frustrating wanting to get things done and your body saying ' bahahahahahahahahahahaha in your dreams! Back to bed you go!'. And then to wake up and find that instead of the cleaning fairies paying you a visit, the garbage goblins have trashed your house. So all hope of actually getting anything done is out the window, because you first need to clean the goblin mess.

Is it any wonder then that I am worn out, run down and running on less than fumes? I'm a wreck.
Regardless of this fact, I have decided that I must persevere. I must set a good example, and I must set that by leading by example. I am sick of trying to motivate others. I am over waiting for certain people to help me out. If it must be done, it must be done by me. I guess that also pacifies my control freak nature too!

I have a kitchen that I really really really don't like. My other half liked it, wanted it, and somehow he and his mum came home with it and then he and his brother in law installed it. Now, I'm a shorty. I hit 5ft tall. I wear heels alot. I can't reach half the damned cupboards! And the colour is so dark and oppressive and there are doors that don't shut and drawers that don't shut and I can't see the back of ANY of the cupboards. Oh, I just had an idea - those touch/sensor led lights, I am so going to get a heap of them, and whilst I'm at it, I'm gonna get some for my wardrobe too, can't see a damned thing in there either (or reach the top shelf!).

So, I've started the prep coat on the cupboards (no sanding required!) I've probably talked about this before. I am ultra excited to be finally doing something I've wanted done. It sucks that I have to do it but I'm going to be really proud of myself when it's done. And I can say - just because I have 'disabilities' does not mean I do not have worth as a human being or as a member of society.

That's the problem with labels, they aren't always helpful. If I act 'happy & health' (the chronically ill know that being 'well' is a mental battle that never ends) then people assume I'm fine or worse, that I'm a lazy, attention seeking whinger. But if I act how I truly feel (you don't want me to go there, trust me) then people tell me a) how ill I look and I should be resting (cue pity etc), b) people tell you to 'just snap out of it', 'just smile and things will be ok' or c) the head game starts to get the one up on you and you can't cope. It's a bitch of a 'catch 22'. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
And heaven forbid if you get genuinely ill with the flu or bronchitis or something. Your body doesn't want to know about it, that's for sure. And it's hard to get anyone to take you seriously because of all of the above.

So, even though I'm 'normal' sick I must soldier on. Those cupboards aren't going to paint themselves and let's face it, I'm not going to get a rest until I end up in hospital so I might as well go hard until then! (I've got that self deprecating, sarcastic look on my face).

Now, time for some prose....

A flip of the coin
Your life changes around
Tossed into the sky again
Time twists, warps, bends
Slowly readjusting
The locations are all new
Have you found your footing yet
Time to toss the coin again

I got more but the need for sleep is winning.
Have a great week all xoxxo