So, hubby made it to the cricket grand final. Excuse me if i'm repeating myself for the 50th time, this week is a bad one (stupid chronic illness and pain syndromes!). Out of the 4 teams in the semis - all 4 teams made it, only his got through. Typical. But he's worked hard for it. He runs that club sometimes single handedly (i don't care if spell check tells me that's not a word, i just added it to the dictionary - go on, i dare you to look it up!) and he's Mr Competition. It nearly cost us our relationship but we made it through. I'm down to 1% function and am running below empty so the end of the season can't come soon enough for me.
Yesterday I slept until 2.45pm and I hurt so badly everywhere. If you could see the handful of meds i take several times a day (all in one go, i must hold a record or something, surely) you'd be wondering how the hell i could still be in so much pain. I often wonder that myself. Then I remember that I didn't have a nap at all on the weekend and I didn't take my huge magnesium & extra extra doses of B12.
Today I managed to fall asleep on 3 separate occasions during the day. And today is not a Kinder/Day Care day. Mummy guilt - 125% and climbing but as i'm so tired, I won't remember this tomorrow! (seriously, i won't!). And these are the fall asleep mid conversation type things, like a narcoleptic without narcolepsy.
It's funny, one of my GF's, who has 3 kids (my idea of hell, as I struggle with my 1 angel...maybe in another life time) said to me how hard she found it when she had larangitis to keep things together. And the time she went on the biscuit and couldn't move for nearly a week. And being wives/mothers, not sure how it is for everyone else, but things tend to not get done, or slacken off considerably if you're not cracking the whip. Anyway, point of the story, apart from she is exhausted and at the end of her rope from trying to keep everyone else chipper, she said to me - how the hell do you do it? Seriously? I can't even begin to imagine.
I try not to think about it. It's too hard. You just keep going because you can't stop. Oh, and did I mention that I am stubborn. STUBBORN!!! I refuse to give in (although that might be just what i need). And apparently at the moment the body is forcing me to give in. I HATE not having control over when I am awake and asleep! A 3 year olds feet kicking me in the back during the night for the past 2 nights has not been helping either.
Gotta hand it to hubby tonight, he did the dad/mum duties (probably only for an hour or so but it counts because i was unconscious) and when i did wake up from some freakishly bizzare dreams he got me dinner in bed. Even gave me coke in a sippy cup like i asked for. He didn't want me to have my laptop 'because then i'll wake up and not go back to sleep and i need to rest because he can't help me this weekend due to the grandfinal' (seriously.... ok, i guess so) but no amount of anything is going to keep me awakes.
I did achieve one thing yesterday - apart from those pesky house duties i still manage to do.....
I occassionally do some testing (can't be bother spell checking etc tonight, can barely see the screen. Feel free to arrest me grammar nazi's, i could use a week in grammar jail to recover) for a very creative embroidery designer at A creative Medley. www.acreativemedley.com/
Hubby, my dear sweet sleep police, has just come in to take me laptop so I have to give in to sleep again. I DON'T WANNA GO TO SLEEP! Who am I kidding? Of course I want to go to sleep, just want it it happen when I chose it , not when my body decides.
Sweet dreams lovelies xoxxo
